1. If you’re rich, you’re an asshole.
2. If you’re poor, you’re an angel
3. You get to run out of a restaurant without paying the bill. All you have to do is slap someone and storm out in tears.
4. Everyone has cancer.|
5. You’ll get a flu/cold/fever after getting caught in the rain for 5 minutes.
6. When you’re sick, your boyfriend carries you on his back and races to the hospital. He hasn’t even heard of taxi/buses/hitching a ride
7. Even if you’re poor and can’t eat, you never wear the same clothes twice.
8. If you’re saving someone from being hit by a speeding car, you’ll push them out of the way and wait for the car to hit you instead.
9. If you don’t want to answer your lover’s call, you can’t turn it off. You’ve got to take out the battery.
10. If you’re in a relationship, you must, at one point, leave the country and have your lover tearfully come RIGHT before you board the plane (vice versa applies as well. You can be the chaser.) 60% of the time you meet each other, and 40% you’re roaming around in circles in pass each other about 6 times. But you don’t see each other.
11. If you’re getting off a plane, you’re always wearing sunglasses
12. If you study in the States (preferably Harvard), you are one of the top students and you can speak perfect English (as assumed by the reactions of those around you). Why the rest of the world OUTSIDE the TV can’t understand a single word uttered in your melodramatic voice is beyond me
13. If a car ever breaks down or runs out of gas, it will happen on a small rural road with no other traffic, late at night. The area will also have no cellphone coverage, and you gotta walk the whole 10 miles back to civilisation in your 5-inch heels.
14. All Korean men can drink hard, smoke long, sing well and play the piano. Usually all at the same time, at the same restaurant that has a piano. The girlfriend doesn’t know this until she sees him playing the piano at night.
15. For one reason or another, a guy comes out of the bathroom naked/chest bared. Utterly shocked, you cover your eyes while screaming and pointing at him, while the guy screams along and covers his chest.